The Seventh Commandment is a pain in the butt

By Capulet B. Chakupeta

4th April 2011:- If Moses was to come back to this generation, we would ask him to confront and petition God to remove one commandment from the list of ten. That would be the Seventh Commandment!  This is the commandment that dis-embraces all sexual encounters prohibited among the unmarried – trespassing in the thighs [ouch] of another man or woman’s partner, let alone simple felonies like fornication, incest, rape, even simple lust!

This is one commandment that is ruptured left, centre and right. Marriages have broken because of this; people have been killed because of trespassing in bedrooms that aren’t legally theirs. People have devised ways of evading the one they are legally married to, in order to simply break this commandment.

Statistics show that up to 50% of divorces are a result of infidelity by one partner [the one caught] and the other 50% is shared among a whole host of other reasons. If infidelity amounts to such a high percentage, and we are in possession of figures of numerous others cheating on their spouse, then, the Seventh Commandment is but a pain in the butt. In one frame of mind, we feel we have lost the battle against control of our sexual drive.

There clearly is an unwillingness to condemn adultery. We have become a society that is increasingly reluctant to make any judgments about sexual behaviour. One can lamely argue that our society’s attitude to sex is a result of the 1960s sexual revolution. That revolution so robotized our morality on the sexual front that people no longer hold the sacredness of sex, especially stealing from that which is not theirs.

Infidelity has become so common and fashionable that friends share secrets on how they are romping behind their spouse’s backs. Whenever such a topic comes up, people talk it out with such ridicule and easiness that infidelity appears like a pastime activity, or talk show to entertain an audience.

Such has become of our present society, and there are a wide range of reasons to justify this lack of respect for chastity even among the married couples. Society refuses to judge sexual impropriety because so many of us have been guilty of similar actions.

People think adultery is wrong the way models think it is good to be thin, yet they lack the will to keep off the weight. Many people do not want to admit to condoning what’s basically seen as sinful or immoral behavior, nor do they wish to be betrayed, but they want to leave the door open for their own wishes to be actualized.

Studies have shown that infidelity is the primary cause of divorce, yet we tend to hear of varying reasons when couples take one another to court for divorce. To my cheating sisters, here is what’s driving fellow women to cheat. [Men have different reasons; that will be subject to another article].

Our modern cultures promote, glamorize, and even defend adultery. Writing in the New York Times Magazine, Katie Roip said, “….we have grown much more tolerant of adultery, at least when it comes to women. Women’s magazines practically recommend it to their readers as a fun and health activity, like the buying of a new shade of lipstick”.  The Harper Bazaar tells us that “…if a woman has an adulterous affair, she is asserting her femininity”.

Is that so?  What kind of values do we attach to marriage and fidelity? Do we notice that people arrive at values through exposure to what their society accepts, and what people laugh at or yearn for will spark imitation and acceptance?  A married woman friend of mine reports that it is too easy when you are married to look for comfort elsewhere when trouble is occurring at home.  How then do we deal with troubles in the house when they face us?

Fashion trends have had their contributions. My neighbour tells his daughters to be mindful of how they dress.  He says to them:  “…Don’t ‘advertise’ unless you have something to sell”.  The woman’s body has been treated as an item for advertisement. Most of the adverts on billboards and in the media have scantily dressed women. And our sisters parade their bodies freely in the name of freedom and fashion.

Few think of the respect and worthy of their bodies. Dressing has become an issue even in Churches.  I have noticed how people dress on Sundays when they attend Church services.  Yes, no miniskirts, no revealing clothes, no cleavage showing unnecessarily.  Yet, after [Church], when they lime around, they are literally naked.

Of all the impulses and human drives of man and woman, sex is probably the most powerful and difficult to manage. Sex is natural.  “…Why should the human animal attempt to control its expression”, some have asked. Is adultery or breaking of the Seventh Commandment a result of how we present ourselves?

I am just trying to find out, from cheaters and the cheated!  END.  Please log into www.ugandacorrespondent.com every Monday to read our top stories and anytime mid-week for our news updates.

capuletsj@gmail.com


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